“Second Class Citizens”

21 05 2009

I was having an argument with a guy the other day and  he accused me of bigotry, homophobia, and believing that homosexuals were “inferior” second-class citizens.

All because I do not support their right to marry. Now, I believe civil unions are a good compromise that would ideally give them the insurance, hospital, inheritance, etc. rights that they seek.

My home state of New Jersey happens to be the one state in the country that has legalized civil unions that has neither approved nor banned gay marriage. If someone has a gay marriage in another state, we recognize it as a civil union (but not a marriage) here.

But that’s not what I’m looking to talk about today.

I don’t believe that gays are second class citizens. The American people, however, might…

Over thirty million people watch American Idol every week. Twice, people who were thought to have been homosexuals have made it to the finale, only to lose.

In the case of this year, the “homosexual” was the judges’ favorite, and overwhelmingly seen by people who watch the show (I do not.) as the better singer of the two finalists. Despite the fact that pictures of him making out with another man leaking out on the internet, he was widely expected to win. Every article I’ve seen about the results calls this a major upset.

A new record was set. Over 100,000,000 people voted. Ryan Seacrest refused to reveal how many votes separated the two, but given that this season’s ratings were lower than they have been in the past, it’s likely that a major factor was the fact that one of the two was a 23 year-old married Christian while the other was a 27 year-old irreligious homosexual who painted his nails black like some kind of emo Fall Out Boy fan.

Male celebrities are often told never to disclose that they are in a relationship because of concerns that it will upset and perhaps turn away their fanbase, which largely consists of teenage girls. So if they say hokey Kris Allen was less talented — and married — why would he win a popularity contest watched mostly by the younger, more tolerant generation? 

I suppose maybe we’re not as tolerant as everyone says we are.

When I heard about the matchup a few days ago, I predicted this result. We’re involved in a culture war, whether you like it or not.

Even the people of California voted against gay marriage. Granted, that led to churches being vandalized by gay extremists. The same gay extremists who have attempted to slime the name of Carrie Prejean, whose beauty is second only to her bravery.

So I’m calling it now. The homosexual lobby are going to look at this result and claim homophobia was the reason Adam Lambert (known as “Glambert” by his fans) is not your American Idol.

And as a result, he will become one of their new gay icons, much like Clay Aiken was even before he came out of the closet… and that will probably only help Lambert’s album sales. Has anyone seen Ruben Studdard in the past five years? I think he might have become a competitive eater or something.

And here we all thought American Idol was all about music.





Top Six

19 05 2009

David Letterman sucks. His “Top Ten” lists aren’t even funny ninety-nine times out of ten. Here’s where I namedrop Conan, because he’s awesome, but he’s not known for a Top Ten list, therefore, irrelevant to the scenario.

So, since I like the number six and I have a few minutes to kill, I’ll try to list my top six of just about everything.

 

[Updated 5-19]

 

EARLY CONQUERORS:

  1. Gaius Julius Caesar – Roman Dictator (Conquered France and Egypt)
  2. Alexander the Great (What didn’t he conquer?)
  3. Justinian – Byzantine Emperor (Re-conquered the Western Roman Empire)
  4. Attila – Khan of the Huns (Conquered most of Central Europe)
  5. Charlemagne – Holy Roman Emperor, King of France (Conquered Italy, Germany)
  6. Joshua - Judge of the Israelites (Conquered the Canaanites)

LATER CONQUERORS:

  1. Napoleon I - Emperor of France, King of Italy (Conquered most of Europe)
  2. Genghis Khan – Mongol Khan (Conquered most of Asia)
  3. Adolf Hitler – Führer of Germany (Conquered most of Europe)
  4. Joseph Stalin - Soviet Dictator (Conquered most of Central and Eastern Europe)
  5. Timur – Timurid Emperor (Conquered most of Western and Central Asia)
  6. Mehmed II - Ottoman Emperor (Conquered Constantinople and the Balkans)

AMERICAN PRESIDENTS:

  1. Nixon (1969-74) Rep.
  2. Reagan (1981-89) Rep.
  3. T. Roosevelt (1901-09) Rep. / Prog.
  4. Lincoln (1861-65) Rep. / Nat. Union
  5. Kennedy (1961-63) Dem.
  6. Truman (1945-53) Dem.

CARTOON TELEVISION SERIES:

  1. South Park
  2. Rocko’s Modern Life
  3. Doug
  4. Celebrity Deathmatch 
  5. Dexter’s Laboratory
  6. Beast Wars: Transformers

TALK SHOWS:

  1. Tough Crowd w/ Colin Quinn
  2. Red Eye w/ Greg Gutfeld
  3. The Daily Show w/ Jon Stewart
  4. The O’Reilly Factor
  5. Late Night w/ Conan O’Brien
  6. Space Ghost Coast 2 Coast

LIVE ACTION TELEVISION SERIES:

  1. All in the Family
  2. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
  3. Married… With Children
  4. Law & Order
  5. House
  6. The Wonder Years

 MOVIES:

  1. The Godfather [Pt. 1] (1972)
  2. Apocalypse Now (1979)
  3. The Godfather [Pt. 2] (1974)
  4. My Cousin Vinny (1992)
  5. Gladiator (2000)
  6. Face/Off (1997)

DESKTOP/PC VIDEO GAMES:

  1. Quake II
  2. Diablo II
  3. Quake III Arena
  4. 10Six/Project Visitor
  5. Europa Universalis II
  6. Crusader Kings

CONSOLE/HANDHELD VIDEO GAMES:

  1. Super Mario RPG
  2. Dragon Warrior
  3. Super Mario Bros. 3
  4. Final Fantasy VII
  5. Super Mario Bros.
  6. Pokémon Red

VIDEO GAME CONSOLES:

  1. Nintendo Entertainment System/Famicom
  2. Super NES/Super Famicom
  3. Sony PlayStation
  4. Xbox 360
  5. Nintendo 64
  6. Sega Genesis/Mega Drive

AUTHORS:

  1. Dr. Seuss (various)
  2. Ayn Rand (Atlas Shrugged, The Fountainhead)
  3. Niccolò Machiavelli (Il Principe, The Art of War)
  4. Charles Dickens (Great Expectations, A Christmas Carol)
  5. Harry Turtledove (various)
  6. Tom Clancy (various)

COMPOSERS:

  1. Richard Wagner
  2. Frederic Chopin
  3. Giuseppe Verdi
  4. Ludwig van Beethoven
  5. Pyotr Tchaikovsky
  6. Goachino Rossini

BANDS:

  1. Guns N’ Roses (hard rock / glam metal / industrial)
  2. Oasis (britpop)
  3. Rammstein (industrial)
  4. Metallica (thrash/heavy metal)
  5. Nine Inch Nails (industrial)
  6. Marilyn Manson (industrial)

ALBUMS:

  1. Appetite for Destruction [Guns N' Roses] (1987)
  2. (What’s the Story) Morning Glory [Oasis] (1995)
  3. Thriller [Michael Jackson] (1982)
  4. Antichrist Superstar [Marilyn Manson] (1986)
  5. The Marshall Mathers LP [Eminem]  (2000)
  6. The Wall [Pink Floyd] (1979)

SINGERS (Male):

  1. Axl Rose
  2. Frank Sinatra
  3. Luciano Pavarotti
  4. James Hetfield
  5. Ozzy Osbourne
  6. Till Lindemann

SINGERS (Female):

  1. Kelly Clarkson
  2. Hayley Williams
  3. Carrie Underwood
  4. Lady GaGa
  5. Mandy Moore
  6. Lily Allen

GUITARISTS:

  1. Jimi Hendrix
  2. Zakk Wylde
  3. Jimmy Page
  4. Buckethead
  5. Slash
  6. Frank Zappa

PRIORITIES:

  1. God/religion
  2. Family
  3. United States
  4. Job
  5. Friends
  6. Sicily

CITIES:

  1. Brooklyn, New York
  2. Manhattan, New York
  3. Palermo, Sicily
  4. Boston, Massachusetts
  5. Toronto, Ontario
  6. Catania, Sicily

FOREIGN COUNTRIES:

  1. Italy
  2. Ireland
  3. Germany
  4. Japan
  5. South Korea
  6. United Kingdom

SPORTS:

  1. Baseball
  2. Football (American)
  3. Ice Hockey
  4. Football (Soccer)
  5. Bowling
  6. Boxing

FOODSTUFFS:

  1. Pizza
  2. Cheeseburgers
  3. Pasta
  4. Steak
  5. Fish
  6. Cereal

BEVERAGES:

  1. Tea (iced)
  2. Water (vitamin)
  3. Tea (hot)
  4. Vodka
  5. Soda
  6. Tomato Juice

HAIR COLORS:

  1. Dark Brown
  2. Black
  3. Light Brown
  4. Auburn
  5. Red
  6. Blonde

SKIN TONES:

  1. Olive/Mediterranean
  2. Pale/Central European
  3. Yellowish/Oriental
  4. Very Pale/Northern European
  5. Light Brown/Hispanic/Native
  6. Dark Brown/Black/Indian

CAREERS:

  1. Politician
  2. Musician
  3. Athlete
  4. Diplomat
  5. Author
  6. Historian

ANIMALS:

  1. Zebras
  2. Penguins
  3. Dinosaurs
  4. Dogs
  5. Giraffes
  6. Hippopotomi




“Peace in the Middle East!”

11 05 2009

Was a popular way of saying goodbye to a friend when I was growing up in Brooklyn. I had a couple of Jewish friends, but by and large, we didn’t really know about the Israeli-Palestinian situation. To be honest, even if we had, I doubt any of us would’ve cared.

We’re privileged to live in a country where our neighbors can’t bother us. Not only are we protected by the Atlantic and Pacific oceans, but the Canadian economy also revolves around trade with the United States. Sure, we’ve gone to war with Mexico, but after getting your nose broken a few times, even the thought of a bloody nose turns you off. They don’t want war with us. Their strategy is to send their poorest citizens to America, have them work here, and send a large portion of the money they receive back home, thus helping to stimulate their local economy without Mexico having to worry about feeding and employing them.

The United States and Israel are like polar opposites in that regard. While we were able to be isolationist for a long period of time, Israel doesn’t even have the luxury of being able to stop and catch their breath.

Israel was created in the late 1940s, largely due to the Holocaust in Europe and feelings of guilt on the part of the British and American governments. If you happen to believe in an organized, monotheistic religion, all three Abrahamic faiths believe that it was granted to them by God after they were able to escape the chains of bondage as Egyptian slaves. Since their return to the Levant, the Jews have not only been surrounded by enemies on all sides, but within as well. Twenty percent of Israeli citizens are ethnic Arabs. Mind you, those are Israelis, not even Palestinians. Ninety percent of those Arabs are Muslims, while the remaining ten percent are Christians. Imagine if one-fifth of your neighbors were people that could wake up one morning and decide to blow up a school bus or a wedding ceremony. Granted, any nut here could wind up being another Timothy McVeigh, but the odds of that are significantly lower. That’s also not to say all Arab Israelis are radicals. Far from it, actually. I’m just attempting to shed some light as to the Israeli mindset. Not only do you lose your grandparents to Hitler or Stalin, but then you have to fight to keep the same from happening to your children.

There are over three hundred million Arab Muslims living in the Middle East, as opposed to six million Jews. To say the odds are stacked against them is hardly an understatement. From day one, Israel has had to fight with their neighbors in order to survive. In 1948, tiny Israel was attacked by Egypt, Iraq, Lebanon, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Syria, and Yemen, among others in the Arab-Israeli War. In 1967, Israel was again attacked by Egypt, Iraq, Syria, and Jordan in the Six-Day War.

In Munich at the 1972 Summer Olympics, the Israeli Olympic Team were murdered by Palestinian terrorists.

They have to live in fear for their lives every day. They have to draft every young adult citizen – both male and female – into their military in order to protect their families.

So when the so-called moderate King of Jordan gave an interview that was published today, he stated that if President Obama and Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu are unable to come up with a deal that Arabs are willing to accept, it will show that the Obama Administration is “just another American government that is going to let [them] down”. He compared Israel to North Korea, and said that if they don’t make concessions soon, “We’re going to have a war.” So, rather than taking any of the blame for the issue, he says that if peace isn’t achieved in the near future, it’s going to be President Obama’s fault — America’s fault.

Now, I find it sadly ironic that the so-called progressive, pro-Western, free-thinking King Abdullah II of Jordan is calling for the Israeli government to offer even more land back to the Arabs when he himself has no business being in Jordan.

Abdullah is a Hashemite. That is to say, a member of the Hashemite Dynasty from what is now Saudi Arabia. In 1916, one of his Saudi Arabian ancestors led a revolt against the Turks whom had occupied most of the Arab World for several centuries, and as a result the Hashemite clan became kings of modern Jordan, Israel, Palestine, Syria, Iraq, and Saudi Arabia. In the decades that followed, his family managed to lose all of those kingdoms, with the exception of Jordan.

He has no right to lecture the Jews on returning lands to their supposedly rightful, pre-war owners until he himself stops collecting taxes from the indigenous people of Jordan. He wasn’t elected by the people. He is not native to Jordan. His namesake, Abdullah I, who came from Mecca, conquered Jordan in 1921.

I’d like to see a peaceful co-existence in the Middle East, just as I’d like to see a resolution to the Korean situation and, eventually, Irish reunification. That said, it’s wholly unrealistic to ask Israel to respect the wishes of “57 countries” that, as King Abdullah mentioned, refuse to recognize Israel, many of which fund terrorism and would like nothing more than to see the Israeli people forcably removed from their homes.

Sadly, it seems as though the pro-Western voices in today’s Muslim world don’t sound all that differently from the reactionaries in Iran.

In 2000, Israel offered 100% of the Gaza Strip and over 90% of the West Bank at the Camp David Summit with President Clinton and Yasser Arafat. Arafat refused the deal. It’s all-or-nothing for their side.

When Abdullah says they’ll attack Israel if they don’t make more concessions, it sounds eerily similar to when Ahmadinejad said that the occupiers of Jerusalem will vanish from the pages of time.

Now, I don’t claim to have the solution to the problem. I have no answers to contribute, only more questions. But at least if they were asking questions rather than making unrealistic demands of one-another, there could be more dialogue and more mutual understanding and less unnecessary bloodshed on both sides.





Reflections on 2008

1 05 2009

I remember being told when I was growing up that “You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.”

Now, if we had that phrase in New York City, I’m relatively confident that the rest of you have it in the heartland of Middle-America.

Nowadays, you have Republicans pissing and moaning about how we need more Sarah Palins, more Rush Limbaughs, and more Rick Santorums, as opposed to your John McCains. McCain, they claim, was a RINO [read: Republican In Name Only] and as such, the fake wishy-washy centrism of Sen. McCain is what doomed their brand in 2008, forcing America and, by association the rest of the world to suffer for four or even, God help us, eight years of teleprompter torture and South Side of Chicago socialism.

As is usually the case, the truth is much less convoluted. George W. Bush extended the War on Terror into Iraq. He poisoned the Republican brand with his ineffective manner of speaking and inability to sell his own point of view, effectively dooming his actions to low popularity among the populace, especially given the left-leaning nature of the mainstream press who were more than happy to crucify him in the court of public opinion.

Now, I voted for George W. Bush over John Ketchup, and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. It’s the old lesser of two evils routine. That being said, you only have George W. Bush to blame for Barack Obama being President today. The same George W. Bush that launched an offensive, and arguably racist ad campaign against John McCain in 2000 turned out to be the one to torpedo the Republican Party in 2006 and 2008. Even in Florida, where Bush’s brother, the former governor remains highly popular, Obama managed to beat McCain on an outsider’s message of change. McCain wasn’t seen as the moderate who would be willing to cooperate for the good of America. The Democrats were effective in branding him McSame, insisting that his election would amount to a third term for Bush. In essence, what the talking heads on TV and the radio aren’t telling you, is that John McCain was seen by the voting public as too conservative. Whether that’s true or not isn’t the issue. What matters is that he certainly didn’t lose because he was an open-minded guy who was able to cooperate with Democrats in order to get things done.

John McCain, for whatever his faults, is the ultimate outsider. He’ll cross party lines whenever he believes it’s for the good of Arizonans and the American people as a whole… and, despite never having achieved a very high level of popularity in his home state, he has always steadfastly refused to add any pork projects for Arizona to Senate legislation. Whether you agree or disagree with the man on a particular issue or not, he has always been a man of honor, principle, and bravery.

While no politician is pure as snow, and they are all crooked to varying degrees, John McCain was simply the best choice the GOP had both in 2000 and 2008… and to have a patriot like him slandered for no apparent reason other than to make him the scapegoat for their own failures is ridiculous. Sarah Palin would not have won the 2008 election were the names on the ticket flipped. No Republican alive could have done any better than McCain did in the climate we’re in today. Not Romney, Not Rudy, and not the Huckster. Each and every one of them had their own flaws. Rudy being a philandering libertarian from a very liberal city, Romney for being knee-deep in big business, a flip-flopping fraud, and a Mormon to boot, and Huckabee being a likeable theocrat, but a theocrat nonetheless.

And yet, if you listen to talk radio or Fox News, you’ll hear people chiming in that the Republican party needs to move more to the right and marginalize people like John McCain and his daughter Meghan who dare speak out in calling for a more centrist approach, calling them pejoratives and throwing them under the bus when really, the situation we’re in now is all of our faults.

And if you think you’re going to win back Congress and the White House in 2012 by offering the people vinegar, get used to Barry’s change you can believe in.